The Fall from Grace
by Weasley's Revenge
Summary: Maybe life hadn't been too great before, but it had sure as hell been better when the baby was his.  When he hadn't known that Quinn had cheated on him with his best friend. Where did he go from here? Finn's thoughts during the beginning of "Sectionals"


**AN:** In which, Hannah examines Finn's mental state during the episode "Sectionals."

He thought he had friends. It's not too much to ask, is it? To expect people who you thought were your friends to be honest with you. It shouldn't be too much. They all could have told him at one point or another, (should have told him), and now he has to find out like this.

Rachel refuses to look in his eyes as she tells him, instead staring directly at the crack where the tiles meet the lockers. Her voice is clear and high, and he can't help but think she's happy to be telling him this. But he can deal with Rachel later. Because he needs to hit Puck before he starts crying.

He knows that he's going to start crying. It's inevitable, but right now there is no sadness—only anger and betrayal, hot and bitter, sticking in his throat, and starting to form the tears that only make things worse.

Finn pushes himself off from his locker in a daze and runs down the hall into the choir room. "Hey, Puckerman!" He shouts at Puck's back. As Puck turns around, Finn sucker punches him in the stomach, dropping him to the ground. Finn keeps hitting him, waiting for the violence to ease the pain. But it doesn't because at some point he realizes he's just beating the shit out of one of his best friends. Mr. Shue comes in then and pulls him off.

His voice cracks as he asks Quinn if it's true—because maybe Rachel lied. Maybe Quinn still loves him, and Puck isn't an asshole, and Rachel Berry is just desperate enough to lie about something about this. But when Quinn's voice wavers and she starts to cry his heart truly breaks, right in two.

That's when the tears come. He just can't take holding it all in, and the anger won't do any more so he yells, and storms out of the choir room. He doesn't know where to go from this point. He's going to have to drive home. He's going to have to tell his mom. He's going to have to face Quinn when she comes to his house after school. But right now he's going to hide in his truck and cry like a baby.

He ends up going for a drive after he cries he goes for a drive instead of going home. It's a waste of gas, but he just _can't_. He can't go home and face his mother and Quinn. He can't believe how stupid he was. _The fucking hot tub_.

Carole calls him as he's sitting at the lake. That's where he has ended up tonight , it's right around eight, and he's been here for nearly an hour and half just looking out over the glass-like water. "Finn, what is going on? Quinn came here and packed-up her things. She kept apologizing, and where are you, honey? Do I need to come pick you up?"

And he explains to his mother, in broken, halting gasps, between tears that it wasn't his baby, and yes he is fine, and he can drive home, and he'll be there soon. She catches him off-guard with her next statement, "Rachel's been here since five, Finn. She seems really worried about you."

Rachel is at his house. The Rachel who cared enough to tell him. His mouth opens and closes at a loss for words. He settles for, "I'll be home in a few minutes."

Shifting the truck slowly to get back to the house he starts to think about what this means for his life. He's going to quit Glee to minimize contact with all of the people who lied to him for so long. Football is over so he doesn't have to worry about that right now. The most immediate things he has to deal with are Rachel related. Like, for instance, what the fuck is she doing at his house?

Pulling into the driveway he shuts off the truck's engine. The house is small, but emitting warm light into the chilly November air, and he takes a deep breath wondering how this will go. The door is unlocked, and he follows the sound of voices to see his mother and Rachel talking at the kitchen table. They look so happy together that it catches him off-guard.

They're talking about coffee, or maybe boys, or something that doesn't really matter because as soon as they see him they stop talking. His mom jumps up and wraps him in a hug which isn't the easiest thing for her to do now that he's so much larger than her. He watches as her face falters into one of sadness, "Finny," she whispers against his neck, "I _love_ you. You are the sweetest boy. It's no wonder you never questioned anything."

She releases him dabbing discretely at her eyes. "I'm going to leave you two alone… from what Rachel tells me you have a lot to talk about. When you're done you can show her out," she turned to Rachel, "It's been so nice to finally meet you." And then she smiles this little secretive smile and he wonders what exactly his mom has _told_ Rachel. This could be bad.

The tiny brunette starts talking a mile a minute about lies and potato sacks and he can't really catch any of it until the end when she slows down and goes, "And I'm _so sorry_ everything happened the way it did. You didn't deserve to find out the way I told you, and I must admit that while it was for the good of everyone, I had mostly selfish intents. I'll understand if you never want to talk to me again. I just had to apologize first." She gets up slowly hanging her head and beginning to walk out of the kitchen.

Finn grabs her by the arm and pulls her into a hug, not caring what he's implying to her, because he means it. "Thank you, Rachel. You're the only one who was honest with me. I'm quitting Glee, but I hope that doesn't mean I won't get to see you." He can feel her small hands grab onto the front of his shirt anchoring her to this moment in time.

"We _need_ you, Finn. There's no way we can win sectionals with our b-team and no male lead." He realizes that they're still hugging a he answers her slowly while wiggling out from the contact that was all at once too much and not enough.

"I can't face them, Rachel. They all lied to me. Every damn one of them protected," and he can't say their names yet so he settles for, "those two. I thought they were my friends."

"I know you're hurt and confused, but you can't just throw away all that we've accomplished because of this," and her words make perfect sense, but he doesn't want to hear them so he ignores her.

"I can do what I want, Rachel. I am doing what I want, and right now that's quitting Glee. You may not understand it, but you have to accept it," he needs to go to sleep because he can tell that he's getting grumpier and grumpier. "Thank you for caring," he says as he walks her to the door. She looks him straight in the eyes as she talks to him. He's never really noticed her eyes that much before, but they are a gorgeous shade of brown that reminds him of a suede jacket and right now they are sharp, fierce. Her eyes stare determinedly into his soul trying to convey her strength. God he wished he could have some of the same strength that she seemed to carry like a shield.

"You want to be a leader. You want everyone to respect you. And then you act like a scared little boy. Finn, by doing this you're letting them win." He closes the door a little abruptly after muttering a quick goodbye. What does she know anyway? He isn't letting them win—he's only protecting himself, yeah, that's it. Protecting himself. But in the back of his mind he knows that she's right. When it comes to him, she almost always is.

**AN:** I've come to sympathize with Finn even more in light of recent events, and I hope I did him justice. Also Finchel ending, because I love my Finchel.


End file.
